Walls and Windows
Start by taking a look at your wardrobe. The clothes you buy are often the colors you like best so keep them in mind when choosing paint, wallpaper and draperies. Walls painted in a color you’d never wear can lead to those dreaded words “we have to talk,” and we know where things go from there. Take a trip to your hardware store — the source of all life’s answers — and pick up every paint chip that catches your eye.

After you’ve decided on wall colors, attack what women and decorators casually refer to as “window treatments.” For most guys, this term refers to when a woman begins to change clothes in front of the window and then pulls the shade, as in “she gave me the window treatment.” For the rest of the world, it means draperies and blinds. They may sound frilly, but draperies can be classic, simple shapes that are more gender neutral than girly, especially if you use geometric patterns and rich colors. The same pinstripes, houndstooth, corduroys and argyles you love to wear are also perfect on walls and windows.

Furniture
Moving to “second base” involves furniture. As men continue to practice “why do today what I could put off until tomorrow,” they continue to exist in sparse cave-like spaces with no more than a patio chair and really big TV. Furniture is a way of expressing who you are, and for many men, that’s intimidating. Sam, a technology analyst, took 10 years to buy a sofa. “One of my friends pointed out that I would have the sofa until I was 40, and that paralyzed me. How could I choose a sofa that the 40-year-old me would still like? So I waited until I was 39 to buy a sofa. Now I’m afraid the 50-year-old me will hate it.”

Other men worry about investing in nice furniture their future spouse may not like, so they wait. As the average age for marriage continues to rise, however, men are finding themselves with high discretionary income levels (words like orthodontist and tuition aren’t on their radars yet) and craving spaces that are homey, personal and acceptable for entertaining friends or girlfriends. And there’s a bonus to this trend. A recent survey claims home supply stores are the hottest place for single men and women to meet, crediting how easy it is to start a conversation with a stranger in this situation. So put on your favorite khakis and peruse the aisles of wallpaper and lighting fixtures. “What’s your flexible gasket width?” never sounded so charming.

For married men, the issue isn’t where to start, but how to stop. Their wives, that is. Yesterday’s man may not have cared if his home was pink and green, but today’s man does, and he’s increasingly more involved in furniture buying decisions.

Today’s popular furniture styles are direct and comfortable: the two cornerstones of masculine style. Mixing in a few unexpected pieces, such as a vintage-style mahogany desk or Chippendale chair, can set the tone of a room. When most things are decidedly masculine, everything else — even a vase of flowers — takes on a deeper tone. It’s like being in a conversation where one person has an accent and suddenly everyone starts speaking that way. Don’t feel you have to decorate entirely in dark woods and heavy furniture. In fact, mixing a few floral, light colored or otherwise “feminine” items into your room will lend contrast and make it more interesting. You want the look to be masculine, not barbarian.

Like many men, you may have a favorite chair. Perhaps you inherited it when your Mom went “tropical” at home and Dad’s brown velveteen wonder had to fly north. Or maybe you bought it at the coolest store in NYC’s SoHo as a declaration of your adulthood and first real paycheck. However you came by this remote-gobbling chum, it doesn’t have to be the focal point of your room. Distract the eye with a mantel topped with photos of friends and family, accent it with a curio cabinet filled with odds and ends from your hobbies and accomplishments, or enhance it with a small recessed light in the ceiling perfect for reading. And speaking of lighting, reserve the bright lights for tying flies. Put dimmers on everything and banish the fixture without a shade to the basement.

Size Matters
Addressing other insecurities: when it comes to furniture, one size does not fit all. No matter what style you choose, look for deep seats if you’re tall, wide seats if you’re stocky (many chairs are growing toward chair-and-a-half size these days) and durable fabrics if you tend to tackle more often than sit. An ottoman with an easy chair is a comfortable way to put your feet up, and it can be used for extra seating when needed.

Keep It Down
Rounding the “bases” to third, it’s time to pump up the volume. Inside your handsome entertainment center, you’ll want a great stereo, which brings us to the subject of sound. For best sound quality and fewest neighbor complaints, consider acoustical wall and ceiling panels to absorb rather than reflect sound. These panels are rated according to a noise reduction coefficient, or NRC, that tells you how much sound they absorb. An NRC of 70 means the material absorbs 70 percent of the sound that hits it. A good carpet, upholstered furniture and window treatments will also help reduce the reverberation of sound.

Men’s Club
From tree houses to men’s clubs, most guys like having a place of their own with “no girls allowed.” The leader of the old-boy-style wish list is currently the smoking room — complete with a humidor and pool table, decorated in true throwback style with leather chairs and mahogany paneling. It’s the coolest clubhouse ever. Just be sure to include a good ventilation system and don’t be surprised if the ladies like it as well.

Whether you’re furnishing to impress your friends or your dates, the move to a “grownup apartment” can be as exhilarating as driving your first car. You’ll only get better with practice and your confidence is sure to grow with time. And when you come home to your welcoming den of security and comfort, stand at the door and enjoy your field of dreams. GH